“How do I get Back to the person I was before the Trauma”

We are changing every single moment.

How can we expect to experience life in the same way today as we did yesterday.

We are never the same as yesterday; or the minute before. Yet for some reason after experiencing trauma many have this inner question/dialogue:

How do I become the person I was before the trauma?

And yes for many years I too asked this; and tried many things. Thinking it would bring me closer to that person. Spinning my wheels.

Is that belief/question holding me back?

After experiencing the depths of this inner dialogue I am here to say:

Change the question.

Notice how the question itself shapes a belief that you were better before the experience.

As if your somehow not as “good” now.

Does that mean you will never feel happier than you ever have; for the rest of your life?

Really?

Does it?

I’m here to say:

“Of course it’s possible to feel depths of happiness and love that you have not yet experienced after trauma.”

I’m in it! Soaking in the bliss. I’m human, and have days where I feel the full range of emotions that we all experience. Yet now something has shifted. I acknowledge the wisdom and honour the natural process in which we arrive to clarity. Knowing that all is temporary. I have the power to shift my mindset and discover the infinite possibilities of being. We are the infinite possibilities in a journey of remembering.

The last few years as I’ve been diving in and asking self:

Is it true?

Is it kind?

It it really true?

I’ve felt happier than I ever have in my entire life. After huge breakthroughs; and perspective shifts. Allowing myself to let go of the beliefs that held onto pain without judgement.

Bringing honesty and awareness to my inner dialogue.

After twenty years of PTSD, anxiety, depression; I now have the freedom within to exhale. Experiencing life to the fullest. Knowing the possibilities are infinite. I am the creator of life. I am life itself and life resides within me.

I invite you to inspire from these questions; take time and reflect on them more than once:

How will I show up for myself?

Am I holding space for mind: body: spirit?

Am I supporting the body’s natural healing process?

Am I being kind to self? Through actions and thoughts?

These are some of the questions I ask myself weekly. I check in. Feeling. Trusting loving.

When we are suffering from a question; check in. It may not be that your unable to find the answer. Perhaps your question itself is manifesting the illusion of suffering; as it plants seeds of misunderstandings. Our minds create stories and answers to misinformed questions. We live through these lenses. Our worldview shaping from labels and perspectives of our experiences, not necessarily the experiences themselves.

We have the ability to go within and reshape our perspective of our past experiences……

Yes we do!

That’s amazing news.

You have done nothing wrong up to this point in your efforts to find yourself. Your old ways of supporting and being well served you at the time. Remember that you do have the best intentions as you try. You are always doing your best.

Every moment an opportunity to expand on that knowledge. Be in the space of the now.

Remind yourself to follow your joy. When you live through what brings you joy in life all else naturally falls into place. Make joy your priority and everything that does not serve your purpose will fall away. Trust what falls away. It is creating space for more joy! And the unexpected gifts your manifesting and refine your inner dialogue.

I’ve discovered that there is so much space for me to play within the moment. Setting my expectations aside as I explore within. I trust the moment. Trust myself. Learning from each experience not from a place of judgement; from a place of how I would like to take action in the future.

I am strong

I am confident

I am worthy

I trust

I see

I feel

Within these shifts rise the depths of my shadows. Greet them at the door with tea. And ask yourself:

Is it true?

Is it kind?

Is it true?

Listen to the heart as you feel through it. The stories no longer serve you. You are not the mind. That’s a funny thing! We are the observer listening to the mind. Mmmmmmm let’s investigate what that feels like for you.

How does the body move through these questions?

The big shift of refining the questions inspired from my yoga practice. As I move through the depths of self on the mat, I feel safe to flow through the possibilities……….the openness that something may not be what I think it is. Not taking myself so seriously as I allow the concepts of the mind to flow through without attachment. Being present with “what is”. Courageously willing and open to reveal truths and crack myself wide open; again and again.